Category: Perception and Reality

Ecopsychology, Expectations, Mindfulness, Perception and Reality

Mountain Stream

I am often struck by the countless forms and causes of unnecessary human suffering. It seems like we are constantly getting lost in ruminations about the past and anxieties about the future. We try in vain to predict events and control their outcomes, and as a result, we often do little more than flail around ineffectually. We waste energy, make a mess of even the […]

Expectations, Mindfulness, Perception and Reality, Self-Care, Trust and Control

THIS!

Mindfulness is about spending more time in the present moment. It is a concept that sounds simple and perhaps not very interesting, but in practice, the present moment turns out to be an elusive thing. It does not include the present day, hour, or minute. It is only right now. It is this moment, this experience, this feeling, this action. It is only THIS… right […]

Expectations, Perception and Reality

The Currency of Relationships

Every once in a while, a few of my clients will seem to become synchronized around a single theme or issue. This happened a couple weeks ago, and the theme was obligation. The quick version is this… “Appreciation and apology, not obligation, are the currency of healthy relationships.” When people in a relationship become focused on score-keeping and equity, the relationship dynamic can become adversarial […]

Expectations, Mindfulness, Perception and Reality, Trust and Control

Row Your Boat

Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, Life is but a dream. Having a two-year-old at home, I have been revisiting a vast array of children’s nursery rhymes, song, stories, and fairy tales. Most carry no real weight as vehicles of philosophy, but “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” caught me by surprise. As simple as the words may sound, […]

Mindfulness, Perception and Reality

The Reality of Self and No-Self

I belong to a book group focused on Buddhism and psychotherapy, and one of our recurring discussions is about whether or not there is a self. Buddhist teachings often focus on the idea that there is no such thing as the self, but clinical work in Psychology tends to deal directly with the self. It can be confusing. Is there a self? Do I exist? […]